Tonight I was in my new place, putting things away and arranging them to make the most use of the space my roommate and I have. He wasn’t there because he works an overnight job. I paused and stood in the middle of the living room, and it dawned on me how QUIET everything was…and how lonely it felt. Now granted, part of this is because we don’t have a TV or stereo up there yet, but that isn’t the complete story.
In my mind I did a flash forward. The apartment was fully furnished. Clarence was at work. I was there alone, watching TV. Even with a show or movie on to entertain me, I could still feel that hollow feeling.
What is it? Why is it there? If I am happy not being in my last relationship, then why would I feel this way?
I doubt any of you out there are worried about me doing something stupid, rest assured I won’t. I will not go back to the the previous engagement just to fill a void. Also, I am not one of these people who claims they “hate being single” and will therefore date anything with a pulse.
But I do wonder what it will take to make this feeling stop.