I SUCK…Even Though I Don’t

Today I am a bit under the weather, so there may or may not be a video here. In the meantime, feel free to read.

Artists like me face an interesting dilemma. We want to create art to express ourselves. To do so, we need to make something that is, in our minds, perfect. And there’s the catch: not only will we never say we have achieved perfection, but some of us will never even admit we are any good. Naturally I’m speaking of the phenomenon of being your own worst critic.

For me it is an issue that pops up in all parts of life. I’m very humble, to a fault. I can never admit I’m good at ANYTHING. That’s because in my mind, I worry it might start me down that slippery slope that leads toward arrogance. “Look at me! Read my poem! Hear my song! Aren’t I great?”

It’s not in me to be that way. I mean, I guess you have to be SOMEWHAT arrogant to get on a stage and demand the attention of everyone in the room, but then again I don’t get up there thinking that I’m the best musician in the world.

But you know, it never dawned on me that the opposite can be true. If too much arrogance is possible, then so is too much humility. You can be so down on yourself that you think everything you do sucks. Then again, I should have realized that more than anyone because I’ve thought of myself in that way for a long time…longer than I care to admit.

Another thing about the self-congratulating attitude: you start to think, “I’m so great that I’m good enough.” You become complacent. You never seek to improve or grow. However, when it comes to your art, you should treat it like a romantic relationship: if you bought your partner flowers in the beginning, then you have to KEEP ON BUYING THEM! Otherwise the romance dies.

I guess the only way to go about all this is to think to yourself, “I’m good. Now, how can I do better?” That way you’re not insulting yourself, but you admit you have room for improvement. It’s short and simple advice, but it’s the best I can give,


About Steve Grogan

I am 40 years old, divorced, and a father of four kids. I am a practitioner of a self-defense system called wing chun kung fu. My other hobbies include writing, playing guitar, reading, watching movies, and listening to music. Recently I have gotten back into fitness, and this time I am DETERMINED to get the washboard abs...whether my metabolism will cooperate with me or not! The purpose of this blog is to write not only about my hobbies, but also about whatever crosses my mind, whether it is something I don't understand or something that aggravates me. So join me as I indulge my tendency to think too much about topics that don't usually cross anyone else's mind!
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