DISCLAIMER: As always, this is all my opinion. I’m not saying this is how things really are. Feel free to disagree with me. In fact, I encourage it.
Times have changed, and I am not sure why or how.
Today if Romeo or Lloyd Dobler showed up unannounced, then Juliet and Diane Court would call the cops. I know a couple friends who have been called “stalker” because they tried to pursue young women who caught their eye. In fact, to put all cards on the table, it has happened to me. In 1993 I sent a couple love poems to this girl, secret admirer style. Someone knew that I wrote a lot…they figured it might be me…and they told her. Next thing you know, I’m in some hot water.
I just don’t understand it. Women whine a LOT about how romance is lacking these days. Then someone tries to woo them, and that person get treated like a creep! A long time ago, you used to be EXPECTED to pursue the woman you wanted. It was called “courting.” You didn’t just get laid or put a ring on the woman’s finger after three dates. The pursuit used to be half the fun. Hell, sometimes THAT was better than the destination!
You know…now that I think about the current generation, I believe I see where the problem lies. We are a fast food nation, not just in diet but in mentality. Everything people want, they expect it immediately. If they have to put any effort into getting it, then they abandon that thing and move on to the next TV dinner daydream.
But then one day you meet someone who is interested in you. They seem nice enough, but the feeling isn’t mutual so you turn them down. Then they start doing things to slowly win you over, like sending you flowers or leaving you a heartfelt note. Well, you aren’t used to this. You are used to guys who give up at the first “no.” The spark wasn’t immediate, and yet they keep going. So what do you do? Instead of giving it a chance or at least appreciating the sweetness, you say….
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A stalker…a STALKER!!!!!!!!”
So there you have it, folks. Romeo would be considered a stalker today merely because the instant gratification crowd can’t wrap its head around this type of slow burn approach. Sadly, I don’t think the practice of courtship will be commonplace ever again. But to all you hopeless romantics out there, fear not: there ARE women who still enjoy the pursuit. They’re just hard to find.
Now here’s to hoping you don’t get arrested for aggravated harassment while you look for them.